An elderly Ukrainian man lay dying in his bed. While suffering the agony of impending death, he suddenly smelled the aroma of his favorite pyrohies wafting up the stairs.
He gathered his remaining strength, and lifted himself from the bed. Leaning against the wall, he slowly made his way out of the bedroom, and with even greater effort, gripping the railing with both hands, he crawled downstairs. With labored breath, he leaned against the door frame, gazing into the kitchen.
Where if not for death's agony, he would have thought himself already in heaven, for there, spread out upon waxed paper on the kitchen table were literally hundreds of his favorite pyrohies.
Was it heaven? Or was it one final act of heroic love from his devoted wife of 60 years, seeing to it that he left this world a happy man?
Mustering one great final effort, he threw himself towards the table, landing on his knees in a crumpled posture. His parched lips parted, the wondrous taste of the pyrohies was already in his mouth, seemingly bringing him back to life. The withered, aged hand trembled on its way to the pyrohies at the edge of the table, when it was suddenly smacked with a wooden spoon by his wife.
"Don't eat those!" she commanded. "They're for the funeral."
Money's Worth
A man handed the conductor on the Ternopil trolley bus 50 kopecks. She took it and turned away.
"Where's my change?" the fellow asked, expecting 20 kopecks in return.
"Haven't got any," the conductor said. "You'll have to ride two more stops."
Cat burgler
A farmer was standing on his porch when he noticed the neighbor's cat steal out of his barn. Its belly was packed so full that the feline found it difficult to squeeze through a hole in the fence.
The farmer shouted to his wife: "Just look at that cat! it's grown fat catching and eating our mice!"
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